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Aftereffects

February 12, 2009

“Whats going on in your mind ?” – asked Vivid, in one of the last few comments.

I wish I could give you the right answer. For most of the last 7 days, my mind has been like a circus. Different thoughts are jumping around and crossing each other as on a trampoline. The first few days were the toughest, since it took time for the news to sink in and to acknowledge that I need to make one of the biggest decisions of my life. The admit had brought home the reality that I now needed to get my acts together.

So, the thoughts mainly responsible for my unusually puzzled state were/are –

a) How will I manage the relocation with my wife and kid. Will my wife be able to work – chances seem dull. Will we able to manage the finances if none of us work?
b) Is it wise to give up the Indian MBA during these troubled times? What if I don’t end up with a job? How much debt can we manage? Wouldn’t an Indian mba be better if I have to head to India immediately and search for a job? How will Emory’s brand help in India?
c) What about Kellogg? and Ross and Tuck? What if I do manage to get an admit? Would I not be torn then?

Again, what has helped to wade through such worries is the fact that I am absolutely confident that Emory is a place I would be happy at. That, and the scholarship. It answers all the burning questions in my mind and is probably the difference between me finally going for an MBA in the US and giving up due to the hellish situation for MBA applicants.

The first thing I did was to bug every student I could contact at GBS. I was so anxious to understand what they feel about the whole situation that I now think I overdid it. Still, the great and helpful people that they are, I hope they’d understand. Their optimism despite the cruel markets has been very reassuring.

So, its not been a question whether I would go to GBS or not – thats something that I just knew the moment I got accepted. Its been more about how would I make it work out and deal with the other concerns thats been bothering me ever since.

Deciding to move to US with a family in these conditions with every bit of uncertainty regarding the future requires courage. I’m trying to garner as much as I can. I am overwhelmed, and have mixed feelings about my wait lists. I’m still going to try; but sorry, I don’t think I would be able to afford you. Its not about being practical. Its about not being rich enough to be impractical. I say that with a heavy heart which is about to break.

I hope I take the right decision. Or have the belief and courage to turn it right.

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9 Comments leave one →
  1. Sai Prasad Kothapalle permalink
    February 12, 2009 2:02 pm

    Cheer up !!
    You have already won a big battle. Now it is just a matter of deciding which kingdom to rule as you have won many. There are many(like me) who have lost everything.

    And there is enough time to decide on this. Take your time and rule the world!!

  2. February 12, 2009 5:14 pm

    Dude… I guess when I spoke about those 3 colored cards and the 1 ace up your sleeve, I forgot that sometimes life can surprise you with a Joker! I think a similar thing happened here….. GBS has grabbed you, and its all for the best! Good Luck @ Atlanta!

  3. anon permalink
    February 13, 2009 12:05 am

    Atlanta is a fine city. With wife and kid and with no earnings, it would be difficult even to send the kid to school. Full schol will make life easy for your wife and kid if not for you. Hmm.
    If you get into Kellogg and can afford loan to pay the tuition, may be you can come here alone.(very bad idea may be)

  4. praz permalink
    February 13, 2009 4:00 am

    congrats man, full scholarship is a no brainer, welcome to usa!

  5. February 13, 2009 3:44 pm

    Welcome to my dilemma!! atleast you have a full schol 🙂

  6. February 15, 2009 9:15 pm

    Hey a happy dilemma, and a sensible resolution. This is a tough time for all of us, not excluding those of us who are selected, and following your first choice is always sensible. Will miss not having you in the PAN-IIM group, though 🙂

  7. ahembeea permalink*
    February 16, 2009 12:08 pm

    Anon – so you now see what I’ve gotten myself into 🙂

    Praz – no brainer it is, and I’m trying to keep it that way!

    Ashi – is it still unsolved ?

    Star – I’ll definitely miss that too. Stay in touch 🙂

  8. February 19, 2009 3:07 am

    don’t want to dampen your spirits but thought can hep with some useful info.
    a) Most likely your wife will join you on a f2 (dependent on a student) visa. she will then not be ale to work. a much better option might be see if she can get a h1 sponsored by her employer etc (if she is in software) or gets a transfer thrugh her present employer.

    Even if the above two take time its better than her joining you on a f2. becoz then working is illegal and no employer will hire her.

    About the debt, wI wont worry with a full scol 🙂
    Take care

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